Out of Control! That's my MSN Screen name right now. Why because I sort of feel that way. I believe that I have become almost unrecognizable from what and who I was even a year ago. I'm not the same guy I used to be. It's apparent to me by a lot of the choices I make and the way that I react to things now. Funny how much a year can change you.

I just got back from the bar with Janet; we both just wanted to go dancing no drinking tonight. When I got off work today I felt like going home and watching the ants climb the wall. I didn't even make it into the driveway when the phone rang and Janet told me that she got us on the VIP list to get into the bar tonight. So I had better hurry my ass up, drive to Vernon, join the pig roast that she was at (OMG the food was amazing) then we'd drive home in time for the bar! And I work tomorrow at 9. Oye.

To sum up the past few days Thursday I got home from work, went to Peter's house and got completely smashed with him then we went to the bar. Last night Janet and I went to the Evanesance concert, where she got a little smashed. And tomorrow after I work we're going on a houseboat party with the staff from my store, where I hear that they will all get smashed. When will this rageing social life come to an end. Probably once I completely collapse of exhaustion.

Wednesday night when I was sitting at The Cat's Meow (a trendy restaurant/club in town) with Janet and some friends she turned to me and told me that I needed to look at a picture of myself from a year ago. I did and I have admit that I don't even look like I used to. The change is subtle but it's definitely there. Most people tell me it's the weight loss, others the hair, others the way I dress. I think it's a combination of all of those things and the internal changes to my though processes. Essentially I've loosened up. It's gonna be a wild ride this summer. Big changes still ahead. Stay tuned for details!