I LOVE my FOCUS! It's better than I had hoped. The sound system rocks and sounds fantastic with music as diverse as Britney Spears and Diana Krall (who has released a new album btw!). The motor is quite and powerful. The ride is firm but not harsh. The seats are comfortable and the inside is spacious. The only thing that is wrong with my car is the lack of intermittant wipers! This is supposed to be there but so far is not, back to the dealer I go in a couple of days.

In other news I've been working 6am-2pm for the past two days and tomorrow is 7am-3pm so I have to get to bed.

Going to get my new car today! Now it's off to work.

My room mate is a fucking moron. I can't believe how his mind works. So here's the situation. He comes home the other night unexpectedly after being away for a number of days and announces that he's upping my rent by $50. Fair enough, I really cannot complain because even then I'm getting the deal of a lifetime. I go into my room and find an addition to the contract that we signed at the beginning of September. I then get to looking at the contract and realize that it boldly states that the rent cannot be increased before a year has passed. I then go out and put a note on the front door (he had already gone to bed and was leaving early in the morning) that asks him to "please review the rental agreement that we signed and we can talk to him about this when he returns". I left the agreement with the pertinent part underlined on the kitchen table. I go to bed thinking we can talk about this next time.

So this morning I wake up to the following letter:

"Keith

With regard to our monthly rental agreement you have some things to consider (ok, I wonder what those are?):

1. If we had a signed lease for a fixed period the situation could be different. However, on a month-to-month arragnement, which you asked for and I conceeded, consession need to be made. (sorry I'm confused, are concessions usually made on contracts? I thought that once a contract was signed that was it. It seems that he is under the impression that because we are on a month-to-month tenancy arrangement that means he is exempt from the regular rental laws that apply such as, you can't raise the rent in a period that is less than a year!)

2. (My personal favorite) I was doing you a favour by only charging you $350 while you were at school because someone did that for me in the past. (So sorry I'm confused again. I don't see how the way that you set the original rental price has anything to do with me. If he would have asked for $500 a month when I first moved in he likely would have gotten it. Don't try to sound like a fucking angel, I believe that he was the one who was unemployed for about 9 months when I moved in. I'm quite sure that my rent money helped to save his ass a number of times. SO ANGRY!)

3. The cheapest place in town to rent is $425 + half of the utilities and you can bet it is not as nice and not downtown. (Granted this place is awesome but is that figure for $425 with the room-mate factored into it?

4. You now have the place almost to yourself which I know is something that you appreciate. (So because he finally got a job in Vernon and is happy living with his Grandma there that means that I should be appreciative to him for not being around? How does that work. Whether he's here or not I don't give a rats ass, it's his place. His choices are what caused him to end up in this situation nothing that I am responsible for)

5. I am making an effort to find out exactly when you are leaving and basing my sell of this condo & moving around your moving out as a favour to you. (Again sever anger. Don't tell me that I have anything to do with your decision to list the condo. Under the tenancy act he would still have to give me notice etc. Not to mention the fact that he could have just asked me when I was planning on ending my tenancy and I would have told him that it would be exactly as was originally agreed upon September! The fact that he has never mentioned to me that he was looking into selling this place anytime soon really plays into the situation as well. Hell I'd even make all the arrangement for him, for a commission, if he asked)

Please sign the addendum OR leave me a message at ... and we will discuss living arrangements."

Of all the manipulative bastards! All he had to do was say to me Keith because of the changes in our living situation I would like to raise the rent. I was already thinking about paying him more anyway so really all he had to do was ask. He can't just come running in and tell me that I have to do what he says. I have rights damn-it!

I'm going to start looking into finding other living arrangements for the next four months because I know how much it would screw him to lose my rent. The fact that he's not living here means that he won't be able to get another 'room-mate' because of Strata regs. Right now I'm just so mad about this I'm not really thinking rationally. What I want is an apology from him for that ludicrous letter and I will happily pay him the $50 more a month. I don't want to strain the relationship that we do have though because if I do stay I don't want anytime that he's around to be uncomfortable.

Mood: Angry
Music: None

I have done a horrible thing. I downloaded a copy of Civ III and I'm spending way to much time playing the stupid thing. It's fun but it's also tough without having an instruction book. I have lost both of the games that I have payed. I think this computer may be just like my last computers which play very unfairly.

Aside from that there really isn't anything new going on. I'm going to be working almost full time next week which is good and bad. I want the work but at the same time I don't. Oh well I'm such a conflicted kid.

Need to get out more.

I'm so getting used to doing nothing it's scary. I think the most scary part of the whole thing is that I really kind of like it. I'm totally content to sit at home and look at the things that I should clean up, the dishes that I should put away, all the other little things that usually nag at me. The difference now is that I don't care if it actually gets done or not. It will eventually so why rush it.

Picked up my ticket for the Okanagan Spring Wine Festival today. This time the event is actually going to be held just a few short blocks from my condo and will involve around 35 local wineries. I'm totally pumped about the whole event. Much partying is going to be happening that night.

Well everything on the car front is looking good. I went and took it out for a test drive today and it was awesome! I'm so pleased with it. The windows are going to be tinted in the next few days and I'm positive it's going to look really good. Now I'm just waiting for my Dad to make a decision as to whether he is going to buy my Probe from me for my sister or not. When he makes up his mind I'll be able to go down and collect my new baby! As usual though everything with Dad takes a million years so hopefully I'll know in the next couple of days. I'm currently pushing for sister to get a job down here in Kelowna at my company, which means that she'll need transportation. I know that she has a good chance of getting it so fingers are crossed!

I talked with my friend MK tonight for the first time in a long time. It was great to hear from her. I can't wait until we live closer to each other again and can spend more time together.

It's raining. A lot. I'm going for Sushi. I don't really like Sushi but I'm going anyway.

Get up, go to meeting at bank, go home, go to work, go home, waste time on computer and in front of TV, go to J's, eat chips, watch bad movie, come home, do this, go to bed. Tomorrow may be more interesting. Then again it may not be.

Oh boy was last night interesting. I got very drunk. More drunk than I have ever been. J and I finished off a 2/6 of Vodka then we went to the bar with a bunch of friends. I met my sister and some of her friends at the bar as well. As I don't have a great love of the bar I actually left and went home at 1:26 (luckily I live two blocks from the bars). Once home I proceeded to call and leave my sister a series of 'interesting' messages on her voice mail and for some reason I decided to sent a drunken e-mail to my friend MK in Vancouver. I then went to bed. This morning I woke up ravenously hungry and wondering if I had in fact sent a drunken e-mail. Well tonight I got a reply to it. Wonderful, I'm an idiot.

After getting up this morning I called those whom I was out with last night and we proceeded to go for brunch at Whitespot. J stumbled in still emitting alcoholic fumes and lolling over anyone near by. Aside from a vague nauseous feeling that soon went away I was fine. Thank God I remembered to drink a lot of water between drinks last night.

The trip to Calgary was fun but rather rushed. Turns out my sister didn't really have a plan for what we were going to do once there so I ended up trying to read her mind and make sure that she knew about everything she needed to know about before making a decision. I can understand that she doesn't really know what she needs to be looking for but for heaven sake she's going to have to get aggressive about some of this stuff soon cause her family isn't going to be there making decisions for her much longer.

My car was delivered to the dealership on Saturday. It's going to stay there until the time is right for me to take possession of it. It is really nice though and I'm excited.

I realized this morning that I haven't been to church in the past number of weeks. I can honestly say I don't care. I still feel that I should be committing to it somehow but just don't want to go. I'm supposed to be going to a small group weekly but the timing has just not worked out so far. I have got calls every couple of weeks though to remind me that I had agreed to help out at the Saturday service. How nice. No one calls for any other reason. Maybe I just expect to much.

I feel as though I have very much missed out on a lot of things that are typical rights of passage into adulthood. It really seems as though many of the people I hang out with are enjoying life a lot more than I am. I'm sure it's my imagination but I still feel as though something is missing. Maybe it's that 'God shaped hole' you always hear religious types yapping about. Maybe it's a feeling of not fitting into your own culture, or feeling at home in your own skin. I definitely do not feel at home in my own skin a lot of the time. I have been working at revamping myself and my image as of late. We shall see where I end up.

I'm tired, excited, sore, and just plain feeling weird. I went to the chiropractor this morning where she beat the hell out of me. I felt better though. I've been having to ice my neck because the tenderness is so pronounced.

After the chiropractor I went to work. Nuff said.

Then I went home, checked my mailbox to see if the letter had got here yet. It hadn't. So I went to the Ford Dealer and they ran a credit check to make sure I could and would pay for the car. Surprisingly enough everything went fine and I'm approved. Then they sprung an unexpected surprise on me and asked for a $500 deposit on the car. Good thing I keep my credit card balances low AMEX just made a deposit on my behalf. I mentioned to the Salesman as I was leaving that he should have made sure to tell me that I needed to bring the deposit and he was quite surprised. He apparently wasn't aware that I was supposed to make a deposit. Whatever it's all said and done now and the car should be arriving tomorrow, while I'm on my way to Calgary! Fabulous. I made sure that I listened to the 'Audiophile' stereo system in one of the other Focuses on the lot just so I'd have an idea of what I am getting. It sounded Awesome! Nothing at all like a regular Ford stereo system. I also arranged for the dealer to have the rear windows tinted, I'm going for Limousine tint just because it looks really cool. I may even have the front windows tinted a little.

Well that pretty much sums up my day. It's really strange but instead of feeling extremely excited about my new car I'm already worrying about the payments. I need to learn to enjoy life a lot more and stop being so entirely responsible.

Well I'm off to Calgary tomorrow morning so it'll likely be a while till I write. Until then, stay safe and have fun!

A lot has transpired since my last post. Actually the most important things happened yesterday afternoon after I got home from work. Before leaving the house yesterday morning I sent an e-mail to X company headquarters essentially telling them that I'm getting really mad about the way they are handling their plans for me. I got an e-mail back last night telling me that I will indeed be staying in Kelowna for the first 3 month phase of my program! This is actually excellent news. As my living arrangements here are very good and extremely cheap. So I have one more summer in the glorious Okanagan, it promises to be a summer of wine and leisure.

The second thing that happened yesterday is that I have ordered a car! So excited. I had picked out this car last week and was shopping around the different Ford dealers to see which one would give me the best deal. Turns out that they were all giving me the exact same price. I was really surprised to find out that a dealer is only going to be making $500 off of me buying from them. So with the price not being an issue I ended up picking which dealer I was going to buy from based on personality of the Salesman I dealt with. Anyway about the car.

I have ordered a Twilight Blue (a metallic royal blue color) Ford Focus ZX3. This car has every option available on the ZX3 including: power windows, moon roof, locks, mirrors, leather seats, 6 disc in-dash CD player with 'Audiophile' speakers including sub-woofer, Fog lights, air conditioning, 16" Alloy wheels, tilt and telescoping wheel, cruise control, and keyless entry with alarm. I'm smiling just writing about it!!!

Now that I'm staying in Kelowna my expenses will be significantly less for the first three months which will help me save so that I am more prepared for the September move to Vancouver. Everything is just turning out rosy.

Happy Easter! I'm in Vernon at my parents house where we had a fantastic lunch of an assortment of salads. Very nice and light for Easter. No one wanted to go to the fuss of making a turkey which turned out fine. Aside from my family my Grandma and Uncle P were there, as well as the Answer Man, two of my parents friends with their daughter and my friend J. She manages to show up for a number of pretty good meals. Overall the day has been really good.

I'm extremely tired as my sister and I stayed up to watch Janet Jackson on SNL last night. Reasonably good show but Janet's performance was rather lacking. As a result of going to bed so late I was awaken by my mother and our dog bouncing on my bed this morning yelling about the Easter Bunny. Funny but not very.

The search for a car goes on. I'm totally in love with the Focus ZX3 (www.ford.ca) but I stopped at the Honda dealer in town yesterday and drove the Civic Si-G which caused me to have 'feelings' for the Civic as well. I'm so confused. Both cars are completely comparable and both are consumer reports best buys for their classes. I think that basically the choice is going to come down to a combination of finance rates and insurance costs. Tomorrow Dad is going to call a buddy of his down at the coast that works for Ford to see what kind of a deal he can swing me.

I'm going to watch LOTR III again tomorrow with the Answer Man. I'm looking forward to it but hope that I'll be able to go for a bit of a hike before the movie as well as the weather is phenomenal.

I woke up pissed off this morning. But then I guess that's not a surprise seeing as I went to bed pissed off as well. No one particular reason other than the fact that I am totally twisting in the wind until I get the Fucking letter from my company telling me where I'm going to work and how much I'm going to be making. All this waiting is making me crazy. Everyday I get asked by just about everyone I know "Have you heard yet?" So much is dependent upon the factors outlined in the letter I can't do a bloody thing until I get it. Frustration as a result of powerlessness.

I'm such a fool. Considering which car I wanted and which would be the most economical lead to me the Ford Focus. I can't believe that I didn't consider this car before. Talking with my Dad tonight made me feel rather silly as well. He mentioned the fact that a Focus would be a fantastic choice because he's currently in the process of buying two new Ford trucks for the business which should motivate our local Ford dealer to cut me an amazing deal! We shall see. I'm going up to Vernon tomorrow morning and we'll be going for a test drive and discussing exactly what I want. The fact that I'll be buying brand new just blows my mind but at 0% financing and an excellent deal it just seems to make sense.

Why does the feeling of love always hit me at the most inconvenient times? Maybe it's not love maybe it's just a feeling of not wanting things to change. Possibly a longing for something just within reach and yet... just... slightly out of my grasp. Constantly taunting me. Messing with my mind. Maybe I've just become accustomed to her presence. I don't want to leave her. But I must. Discontent. Sadness? I don't know. Not exactly the feeling I'm feeling. I miss her already.

I have been having just the most wonderful day. I woke up around 9ish and then called my contact at X company in Vancouver. Well it turns out that I will most assuredly be moving to Vancouver by the end of May. I am actually really quite excited about that but of course am already sort of worried about getting all of the living issues nailed down.

After that I went for a swim at the pool which I rather enjoyed. As I was cursing along in the swim lane the rest of the pool was filled with old ladies doing some sort of water aerobics. Rather amusing to watch. Some of them were wearing running shoes. I was pretty surprised by that. I had always assumed that if you wore nice Air into a pool the shoes would constantly be trying to float to the top submerging your head. Happily this was not the case as the old ladies hardly seemed to get their hair wet, always of utmost importance to old ladies in water.

I arrived home and after a lunch of tofu wieners' and fired onions I struck out for X company so that I could book some time off. Apparently my sister needs me to take her to Calgary this coming week so I had to book the time off for that. I also took the first of May off because I was planning on going to the Okanagan Spring Wine Festival (www.thewinefestivals.com) Consumer Tasting. Unfortunately when I got home and checked my calendar I realized that I am supposed to go to a wedding on that day. Of course this has turned out to be quite a dilemma because I would really very much rather go to the wine festival and I have not seen either the bride or the groom for a number of months. Additionally I suspect that I was a courtesy invite because I happened to be getting to know the couple just as they were planning the wedding and that's all they could talk about anytime I was around. We'll see how the whole thing plays out.

Returning from my little errand I realized the Car needed an oil change so I had that done.

Returning home I decided that it was far to nice of a day to be inside so I doffed my shirt grabbed a couple of blankets and a book and laid on the back lawn of my condo. What a fabulous time of year.

Now I think I'm going to see what's on TV and consider if I want to get a movie tonight as I have spent large amounts of money this last weekend on entertainment and cannot afford to continue at the luxurious pace I have been holding.

I like doing nothing.

Ciao!

J's irritated at me because I'm not going on a vacation. She told me that she thinks I'm scared. I don't think that's it. I'm trying to be rational about the whole thing. Maybe I should go to Cuba...

Last night was an absolute blast. Dinner was good and after a bunch of us went out and had drinks at Tonics. Just sat around, drank and had a good time. Kind of worried about my friend JD though, she got really drunk and when I called her this morning she still hadn't returned home. I know that she's safe but I hope she didn't make any stupid decisions.

Wow what a whirlwind couple of days. This last week saw the end of my classes, and the start of some celebrating. Yesterday I went to J's final presentation for one of our classes. This presentation was quite a big deal because it was basically the culmination of three months of very hard work for her. Her parents even came out for it. After the presentation a whole bunch of us went out to Moxies for supper to celebrate. Her Mom proceeded to get completely smashed and a good time was had by all. The evening didn't last all that long for me because after dinner everyone pretty much went their separate ways. I was actually so tired that I came home at 9:30 and went directly to bed.

The last couple of days have really been a blur. I'm very tired but very hyper at the same time. I am literally bouncing a lot of the time. Driving J crazy.

So today I found out that I may have a choice in where I start work. Turns out that I will possibly be able to stay here for the first 6 months of work and then move down to Vancouver for the next 6. I'm still not sure as I'm still waiting for my official letter from Toronto telling me that I made it into the program. This company is setting a slightly disturbing precedence as to not knowing what one hand is doing...

Tonight I'm heading out for supper with a number of classmates. Then I actually think that I'm going to come home and watch a movie.